Dear "The Time Traveler's Wife" Movie

I expected more out of you, of course. I spent 10 dollars and a good 2 hrs of my life for you and you repay me with what? A couple of scenes displaying Rachel McAdams' and Eric Bana's butts? Or was it Brooklyn Proulx's cute interpretation of Clare at six years old? Maybe, or MAYBE it was the sad portrayal of romance between Henry and Clare? No, I'm sure it was possibly the father daughter relationship theme vaguely expressed somewhere at the end. The book is always better (though Harry Potter movies are always really good)than the movie. This is something you just can't help but stick out. However, somewhere in my mind I expected to laugh louder or cry harder. Well, you still left me teary eyed dear movie, but only because Henry DeTamble never stood a chance against time and the inevitable doom that entails. Maybe a few years from now, another director will get the pinata stick and give it another go at candy, though I really doubt it. Someone tell me, what's up with all these novels becoming movies? Screenwriters can't come up with their own shit or what? People, put down your remote controls and popcorn, just put it down. Do it. Read a book, it'll last longer.

Sincerely,
Disapproving Amateur Movie Critic

Dear Ceiling,

I look at you when no one else is home, I put my fingers up against you and try to push myself out of this box I've created for myself. Inside this room there are no doors, there are no windows. It's only you and me. If I breathe in heavily enough with my back against the floor you slip off the roof and onto the backyard. Sometimes you fall off the house and smash the surrounding fence painted badly so long ago. When this happens I get to see the sky in all its glory, the hovering trees looking down on the room and waving sensibly. The clouds passing by look down as well and say goodbye just as quickly as they came. The light dims down, the moon comes out, the stars twinkle in. It's all a twirl of day and night shifting over and over again past my eyes. Only when you disappear my dear ceiling. Only when you disappear.


Sincerely,
Anahi

To Sleep

Dear Sleep,

OH NOW you've decided to take a vacation and walk out on me haven't you? I toss and turn at night, flicker in and out of bizarre dreams, wake up later and later everyday. It's fine, we've agreed you can go out during the day, but the only times you can vacate the area at night is when I have a really important procrastinated homework assignment due in the next 5 hours. I don't understand you, I wake up shittier than when I fell asleep and that isn't how it should be at all. Good thing you didn't take the sleeping beauty job, you would've sucked at it. If you're reading this, sleep, and you've become offended by these words, then maybe you should get another job so I can hire someone else to render me nighttime happiness. We'll sort things out with the sandman tonight, fine? FINE!

Sincerely,
Your "not so sleeping" "so-so looking"